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The Journey of a Champion Woman- Shared by EricaLynn Harris

Meet EricaLynn…

EricaLynn Harris, also known as “The Motivational Queen”, is a Motivational Speaker and Author. Erica resides and plays in Richmond, VA with her 2 sons.

In 2016 Erica made a decision to follow her purpose in life and make it a lifelong goal to inspire, motivate and empower women who desire to discover their greatness that is created for them to WIN!

 Erica is the Author of “The Winning Formula for Women.” This book provides women with 7 steps to become a WINNING WOMAN.  This book led her to create a Facebook group called “The Champion Women’s Society”. This group creates space for women to receive daily motivation so that they can move forward into being a CHAMPION WOMAN.

Here’s What EricaLynn Wanted to Share:

As a young girl growing up with both parents in the home, I was full of energy, and involved heavily in sports. All throughout my high school life, I had a boyfriend and it was fun until they approached me about having sex. Once I informed them that I’m a virgin, and I had no intention of having sex until I was ready, they left so quickly, as if they were in a race to win some type of competition. Of course there were some boys who tried to persuade me to do it, but I wasn’t even thinking about having sex. I was happy with just having a boyfriend. When I graduated high school, I was still a virgin, and wasn’t even thinking about it, and honestly when I did. I thought about having children. I’ve always knew, that I didn’t want to have any kids. I’ve always felt that I didn’t have the skills and know how to be a wonderful mother. But God saw something great in me, and He gave me 2 wonderful sons that challenged me every single day.

Fast forward to 1991, I finally decided to have a sexual relationship with someone whom I’m thought was the one. I decided to lose my virginity at the age of 21. I was tired of losing relationship after relationship because I was choosing to save myself. I informed my best friend that I was ready and she had her own place and it happened in her apartment, it was something I can’t even remember. The craziest thing happened though. I ended up pregnant on my first experience of having sex. We used protection but the condom ripped and now I was experiencing a pregnancy that I was not ready for. Not only was I not ready, but my body wasn’t ready either. At 2 months, I miscarried the baby, and it was so painful mentally and physically. I was able to recover pretty quickly and moved on in my life. That relationship quickly ended as soon I told him I was pregnant. I lost a baby and I lost a relationship.

Now we are traveling through a couple of years, I had become sexually involved with a young man whom would soon become the father of my two sons. It was never a committed relationship with the two of us. We made a decision to have just a sexual relationship. Of course, I wanted more, and I was willing to accept whatever he was willing to give. I was young, vulnerable, and so naïve that I continued sleeping with a man that only was with me for sex. In 1994, our first son was born. I had really healthy pregnancy, with no issues physically. Mentally, it was rough because the father was not there for me at all. He didn’t go with me to doctor appointments, and when I went into labor. My sister called him to inform him that I was in labor and he stated to call him back after I had the baby. WHAT THE????? I DID NOT CALL HIM BACK.

He found out that I had the baby through coworkers. We worked together for the Department of Social Services at the time, and he heard from my supervisor that the baby was born. Did that change anything? Absolutely not. He didn’t see the baby until he was 2 months old. He finally decided to inform his mother that he had a child. He picked our son up took him over to meet his grandmother when our son was 3 months old. So this is the beginning of how our parenting began. With the support and love from my parents, I was able to raise my son with very little help from his father. I filed an order for child support and I began receiving support and he had visitation to see his son every other weekend. Eventually, we continued having a sexual relationship and I ended being pregnant 3 more times. And each of those times, I ended up getting an abortion. And he wasn’t there for those procedures as well. I thought that I was in love. I ended up pregnant again for the 5th time. This was the last straw for me. Of course he wanted me to abort again, but I decided that my body had been through enough damage, and I would not abort. He informed me that no man would have me with 2 kids. He also stated that no man wants an already made family. Fast forward to 1999, the year our 2nd child was born. We had a good co-parenting relationship but I was the one mainly responsible for raising our sons. After our 2nd child was born, I made a conscious decision to end our sexual relationship. FINALLY ERICA!!!!

Raising two sons is difficult, but my situation was different and unique. My oldest at the age of 15 decided to come out and inform me that he is gay. And my youngest son had been diagnosed at the age of 3 with having a learning disability with a speech impediment. I thought to myself why me? Why did God place me in this type of situation? My oldest son and I had a really tough relationship throughout his high school years. I had the hardest time accepting his sexuality. And to be honest, I didn’t want to be around my son. It stressed me out so much that I would suffer from headaches, and end up going back and forth to the emergency room for anxiety. I couldn’t afford to let these issues take control of my life, because I still had another child that needed my attention with his disability. I struggled financially with raising my sons by myself, but God said He will supply all of my needs. He didn’t say how He would do it, but He did. And I’m so fortunate to having a loving supportive family.

I ended getting married in 2010 to man whom I thought was the man that God created just for me. And unfortunately it didn’t work. I was responsible for everything because my husband decided that he wanted a wife to take care of him. Not only was I taking care of my sons, I was taking care of my husband and his son as well. When we married, his son came to live with us. And I was the only one in the home that was working. My husband ended up manipulating me and cheating on me as well. My life was filled with turmoil and I needed to make a decision to end the marriage and move forward focusing on my relationship with my oldest son and raising my son with special learning disabilities. I’ve come to understand that God knew that I was strong enough to deal with having a gay son and a son who was special in the eyes of God.

Today in 2017, my sons and I stand strong as a family unit. We overcome many of life’s difficulties. My oldest son JayQuan is developing into a Champion Man and my youngest champion has graduated high school and furthering his education by being enrolled in a Landscaping and Greenhouse management school. These two young men are the joy of my life. And as I look back over my life, and I think things over, I can truly say. That I’ve been blessed, I have a champion woman’s testimony.

Thank you Sarah, for allowing me to share my story, of being a real mom! This story not only has brought me healing and I pray that it will inspire others to understand that God does not put more on you, than you can bear.

To connect with EricaLynn:

Facebook Group – The Champion Women’s Society

or, of course, leave your comments or questions here, in the comments.

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